From Charming to Belfast -JAX, TARA, and FAMILY-
by skriley316
Summary: A fanfic on Jax, Tara, and the Teller & Teller-Morrow family had J.T stayed alive. It goes back and forth with Jax and Tara in Charming and Belfast. Pairings- Jax-Tara, Gemma-Clay, John-Maureen
1. Chapter 1

**JAX POV**

My parents divorced on the 1 year anniversary of my brother's death. It was obvious both of my parents had been cheating on one another. My mom with Clay, my dad with Maureen Ashby. I had only seen pictures of her, but if it meant my dad was happy again, I liked her. Clay on the other hand, I hated. That was my dad's best friend and he betrayed my dad by hooking up with my mom when they were still married. That affair had started about a week after my little brother had died. I had my best friend Opie to keep me company though. His old man Piney was the new President of SAMCRO since my dad and him established SAMBEL, and my dad planned to move to Belfast as soon as the divorce from my mom was final, so he got SAMCRO while my dad got SAMBEL. Clay was V.P of SAMCRO and my dad met a Scot in Belfast named Filip Telford, better known as Chibs, for the Glasgow smile he had. Chib was Scottish for "to stab" which was what happened to his face by a guy named Jimmy O'Phelan while he tried to take Chibs's wife Fiona and his three year old Kerrianne. The IRA killed Jimmy, since Chibs's was a doctor for them, so he was protected because he was older than O' Phelan. Chibs became my dad's V.P. Jump ahead 5 years, I had a little 4 year old half sister named Trinity from my dad and Maureen, a chunky 9 month old half brother named C.J (Clarence Junior) from my mom and Clay, and the most beautiful girlfriend of all, Tara Knowles. We were Juniors in highschool, being 16. Tara and I were almost never apart. She loved her boyfriend being some badass biker and I loved being a club member. Clay's gift to me on my 16th birthday was becoming a full member of SAMCRO, skipping prospecting, which was awesome, although I still didn't like the prick. Tara and I had finished another year of high school, so we decided we wanted to spend the summer in Belfast with my dad and step mom. Her drunk dad was so easy to convince to let her go on trip half way across the world with her biker boyfriend for 2.5 months. My mom on the other hand hated the idea of it. She thought my dad would be poisoning me with bad thoughts of her, even though I had plenty of those without his help. Only thing keeping me in Charming was Tara, Opie, and my mom having custody of me. My dad said I'd always have a room at his house and a place in SAMBEL. Hell, even if I was prospecting for SAMBEL, I'd take that up in a heartbeat, compared to being in stupid Charming with my manipulative mother, deadbeat step father, and my spoiled, annoying baby brother. After begging and pleading with Gemma for a week, she finally agreed to letting me and Tara go to Belfast, only after giving us both the talk, saying if Tara ends up being a pregnant teen, she'd kill us both. Sad thing is, I wouldn't doubt that. My mom was fucking nuts. She was always stoned and/or drunk, leaving me and Tara to care for C.J a lot, which was the only thing I hesitated on leaving for. I paid Opie and his girl friend $400 if they could stop in a lot and make sure C.J was bathed, fed, and all of that. The early morning of May 23rd, Tara and I hopped on the plane that would take us from San Diego to Chicago, from Chicago to NY, and NY to Dublin, then the bus ride from Dublin to Belfast, so we really didn't get to my dad's until dinner time on May 25th, from all the traveling and the differences in time zones. Tara and I made it through the door, greeted by my messy hair, dirty face 4 year old sister in the midst of a pudding cup.

"_Hey there Trin."_

"_Jackie! You are here!"_

I set mine and Tara's bags down by the couch and lifted her up into my arms.

"_Where's Dad?"_

"_Da's bathing. Ma's down in the store."_

"_They left you hanging out by yourself?"_

"_I'm not a wee baby, I'm 4!"_

"_Got it, big girl. Finish your little snack and go clean your face."_

Her Irish accent was amusing to me. I set her down right as J.T was walking into the living area where Tara and I were standing.

"_Dad, meet Tara, my girlfriend."_

She reached out to shake his hand but he pulled her in for a hug.

"_Hey, if you're strong enough to keep Jackson tied down to you for more than a night, you're something special. Welcome to the family. How was the flight in?"_

"_I'm fine Dad, Tara's a bit jet lagged."_

"_Well then she can go rest in your room. Maureen has been uptight about you and her sharing a room, so I put an air mattress in there. She probably won't check if you are on it, but it was enough to shut her up about it."_

"_Okay, I'll go show her where everything is. Trinity's getting big, huh..."_

"_She's a lot like you son, you'd be surprised."_

I carried our bags up to our room and set it down beside the bed.

"_Okay darlin', the bathroom is across the hall. Next door is Trinity's play room, then at the end of the hall are my parents' room. Across from the playroom is Trinity's bedroom. Thankfully I am not next to either bedrooms."_

"_I feel bad if I lay down before meeting Maureen."_

"_She's downstairs, busy in the store. I'll wake you up before dinner, then you can meet her and everything."_

"_Okay good."_

I tucked Tara in, giving her a kiss on the forehead then went out to catch up with my dad on everything.

Things were running way smoother here. I didn't know whether to tell him that SAMCRO was getting bigger guns to distribute, so I stayed quiet. I knew he hated the guns.

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**~Okay, this is a brand new story, so I'm not sure how I am liking it myself but oh well... Let me know what you think by leaving a review. Thanks!  
Also if anyone can help me getting the Irish accents and slang down, please PM me. I'd call my cousins who are in Belfast, but it's pretty late there now. I appreciate any help!~**


	2. Chapter 2

**TARA POV**

I woke up from my nap feeling so disoriented. I was surprised to see Jax asleep next to me, shirtless with pink cheeks. It was blazing in our room. It was just as hot as California's summers, maybe even hotter. I went into my suitcase and found a fresh tank top and some shorts, so I put those on, pulling my hair up into a high pony tail. Maureen came in just as I got done doing my hair.

"_Jackson?"_

She saw it was me and froze.

"_I'm -"_

"_You must be Tara. I'm Maureen Ashby-Teller. It's a pleasure to meet Jackson's girlfriend."_

There was something about her that scared me. She seemed friendly but the way she was analyzing me was intense.

"_It's nice to meet you to. I've heard so much about you, and John, and Trinity."_

"_You're with a good lad. He has a wild bit in him. John blames Gemma for that. Besides that, he's good. Anyways, wake him up, dinner time."_

"_Yes ma'am."_

She shut the door and I sat besides Jax, gently stroking up and down his rib cage, until he actually felt it enough to wake up.

"_Dinner's ready baby."_

He groaned and rolled onto his back, stretching.

"_It's so hot here..."_

"_Yeah I know. I already met Maureen. She just walked in. Thankfully I was already up and out of the bed. She seems to really like you Jax."_

"_Yeah she does. She's a nice lady. A little uptight, but not all the time."_

"_Should we call Opie and check in really quick?"_

"_Yeah, sounds good."_

I got Opie on the phone, putting it on speaker.

"_Hey Ope, how's everything?"_

"_Gemma's gone off the deep end. She's drunker than hell at the clubhouse. Most of the guys went on a run. Me and Donna are walking C.J around the parking lot in his stroller."_

I looked at Jax and he clenched his teeth together in anger, so I just kept talking.

"_Keep an eye on him for us, okay?"_

"_Yeah, I will. Donna is about to head to Gemma's house and get some things packed for C.J. We're taking him to my house for the night."_

"_Thank you so much. We'll make it up to you when we gt back. Don't hesitate to call. Our phones are on all the time."_

"_Okay, I will. Enjoy your time there."_

"_We will. Talk to you tomorrow."_

"_Bye."_

I hung up and looked over at Jax.

"_Baby, he's going to be okay. Opie's got him."_

"_I don't want to live with her anymore, and I especially don't want my baby brother to live with them. I know first hand, life in Charming with the club is not good. We have to do something."_

"_Jax, we're only 16... It's not like we could take her to court for custody."_

"_My dad can."_

"_We'd need a lot of proof to prove Gemma and Clay are unfit parents. And enough money to buy off the judge. Plus, your dad probably doesn't want to do that."_

"_He couldn't save Thomas from what happened. If he knows he's saving my brother's life, he may. If roles were switched, and he was like that, and Trinity was being neglected, he'd want someone to step in. I'd like to have a sibling make it to their 7th birthday."_

_The wound of losing Thomas was still very open and raw. _

"_I'm sorry... Okay, we'll talk to him about it. Get a shirt on before Maureen gets angry we aren't out there."_

I walked out and took my seat next to Trinity. John and Maureen were at each ends of the table, then finally Jax came out and sat across from me. Maureen had made turkey with corn, and mashed potatoes for sides. John was watching both of us closely. He could tell something was up.

"_How's the turkey, son?"_

"_Good, thanks. Maureen, you did a good job."_

"_Thank you."_

I felt so awkward and out of place. John smiled softly at me, then at Jax too.

"_Is there something you two would like to share?"_

Jax sighed and set his fork down, clenching his teeth together again, so yet again, I spoke up.

"_Issues back in Charming."_

"_Not surprised... What kind of issues?"_

"_C.J isn't in good hands. Gemma is always stoned and drunk. Clay is never around. Even whenever he is, he's just with Gemma, and Gemma only cares to be with him."_

"_Who takes care of the baby?"_

"_Jax and I do usually. While we're here, it's Opie and his girlfriend Donna."_

"_Aww hell."_

John looked at Trinity, then at Maureen.

"_Sweetheart, do me a favor and go take Trinny down to the store. Have her help you stock the shelves or something. I need to talk to Jackson and Tara alone."_

We watched both of the girls go downstairs. Jax finally spoke up.

"_I can't lose another baby brother Dad... We need to do something."_

"_I have no relations to the baby though. Even if we got him out of the house, he'd probably go to an orphanage."_

"_You could get custody of him. At least until I'm 18, then you can sign the custody over to me."_

"_Son, I live in Belfast. They wouldn't let some foreigner take someone else's baby."_

"_When you lived in Charming, everyone loved you. The judges, cops, everyone... They'd help you."_

"_The baby cannot live here. With the IRA... the club... I'm already allowing that with Trinity, I don't want that for some kid that isn't even mine."_

"_We just need Mom and Clay to go away then. Can't the IRA do that?"_

"_She's still your mother Jackson. How would you explain to your little brother when he is older that you had his parents killed by the IRA?"_

"_I'd tell him what psychopaths his parents were... That they'd neglect him. Leave him unbathed for days, in nasty, dirty diapers... Barely feeding him. We'd be helping more than harming by getting them away. Even if they weren't killed, they just need to go somewhere else."_

"_I can't do that."_

_Jax was getting agitated. He slammed his hands down on the table._

"_If roles were switched and you and Maureen were the crazy ones neglecting Trinny, wouldn't you want someone to save her?"_

John stayed calm the whole time, and took a deep breath, thinking on it for a bit.

"_You guys can stay here for a few weeks. I'll arrange some things with Chibs, and Father Kellan Ashby. They will go back to Charming with you two. Things will happen. I'll get in touch with Judge Diaz. Have Piney agree to be C.J's legal guardian until your 18th birthday. Then he can sign off custody to you. Do not make me regret this, son."_

"_Thanks so much Pops..."_

"_If things really aren't as bad as you are making them out to be, I'm going to be fairly disappointed in you."_

"_Dad, I wouldn't make this up."_

"_Tara, is he telling the truth."_

_All of this made me so nervous._

"_Oh uh, yes. He is."_

"_Well then it's set. You both are here until June 20th, then we'll fly you two plus Chibs and Kellan back to Charming on the IRA's private jet."_

"_How is it going to happen?"_

"_I'm not sure yet. I'll let you know when I figure it out. Go get a bath made for your little sister."_

"_Yes sir."_

Jax got up and went into the bathroom. I helped John do the dishes.

"_How is Jackson doing? School wise and everything?"_

"_Pretty good. A's & B's actually. I've been tutoring him a lot, and we have a lot of classes together every year so I make sure he stays focused."_

"_Well that's good honey."_

"_Yeah. His situation, well our situation with C.J and his mom and Clay is stressful. My dad is some abusive drunk, so I am pretty much living with Jax. We are always having to take care of the baby. When we're at school, usually Gemma can sober up but I really don't think she cares too much about him."_

"_She's probably just going through a hard time."_

"_No... It's permanent. She's some stoner drunk. She'll get really drunk and just hold C.J while he cries, calling him Thomas. She's nuts."_

"_Oh..."_

"_What are we going to do with C.J? I mean obviously Piney won't really be taking care of him, it'll still be me and Jax..."_

"_SAMCRO's cabin is in my name. I own that and all the property. You guys can live there with the baby, I'll help you get the locks changed and everything. That way you aren't trapped in Gemma's god forsaken home, and I can help you all with money and everything, I don't mind it as long as you two are being wise. And if you intend on being with him for a long time, more things will come to you too. I've already started to look at you like a daughter in law. I'll do whatever it takes to help protect and provide for you and Jax. And if that means doing the same for C.J too, then so be it. I'm a good guy with a big heart, and big bank account. I'll do my best with you guys, just help me care for my son while I am here and you are there."_

"_I promise I will."_

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**~Reviews please~**


	3. Chapter 3

**TARA POV**

We only got to be in Belfast for a week before John got all the plans for Gemma and Clay's extraction set in stone. We hopped onto one of the IRA's jets and set off for home. John, Jax, and I were with 3 IRA members- Keegan, Joseph, and Garrett. Keegan was mine and Jax's age, and was so funny. Jax was set on thinking Keegan liked me, so Jax was always everywhere I was. I called Gemma when we landed.

"Hey Gemma. We decided to come back early. I think Jax was getting homesick."

"Well good, I need someone to watch the baby. Clay has a 4 day run to go on, and I want to go with him."

"Since when do old ladies go on runs?"

"Since whenever the fuck I do what I want..."

"Gotcha. We'll be at the house in about 45 minutes, maybe an hour. Will you and Clay be there?"

"Of course. We have to get our shit and hit the road."

"Gemma, are you high?"

"None of your concern. I gotta go, baby's crying."

I hung up and sighed. Jax looked over at me after he loaded up the van we were all riding in.

"They're both at the house. This will be easy. I'll get the baby. You have to keep them from running out. Joseph and Garrett gag and cuff them, and take them right back to Belfast."

"Yup. Hopefully it'll run smoothly."

"Are you sure you are wanting to do this?"

"A little too late to go back now babe, we have 3 IRA members ready to get them. They'd kill us if we made them come all the way from Belfast to just go home empty handed."

"That's your mom though..."

"Yeah, and I have my dad. Maybe my mom shouldn't have been such a bitch and neglected my baby brother. Her conscience died with Thomas, CJ being born made it worse for her."

"Jax, I know what it's like to have just one parent... I lost the wrong one. But my dad is all I have now."

"That's bullshit. You have me. Plus, your father is an abusive drunk dickhead."

"Stop it Jax."

"You know if you had the choice, you'd get rid of your dad."

"I don't want to talk about this."

"You know I'm right. He's scarred you up, he leaves the cupboards empty, spending the little income he gets on alcohol. He doesn't buy you clothes or get you anything for school. I have."

"I didn't think letting you buy me things would get held against me."

"I'm not holding it against you, I'm just saying that it's kind of a slap in the face when you say your dad is all you have, when you really don't have him. You have me. You have my dad, my siblings, my step-mom, SAMBEL, and SAMCRO."

"I'm a 16 year old girl. I don't fit in with your life."

"Don't fit in? Tara... You ARE my life. Yeah the club and my family is part of it too, but you're gonna be my old lady one day, you're the most important person to me."

I could feel my cheeks get a little hot, knowing I was blushing. I sounded like such a bitch when I said that.

"I love you Jackson."

His face softened from the anger that had risen to it.

"I love you too. Now we need to go rescue my baby brother and get to the cabin before SAMCRO notices Gemma and Clay are missing."

**JAX POV**

We made it back to the house. Gemma was on the phone in the living room, holding CJ who was screaming and crying. She was just talking over him. Tara walked over and reached out for him and Gemma all too gladly handed him right over. I yanked Gemma's phone right out of her hand and hung up on whoever she was talking to.

"Jackson, what are you doing?!"

"Taking care of my brother. Where is Clay?"

"Went to change clothes."

Just as she said that, he walked into the room.

"Seriously? You two can't shut the damn door?"

We had left it open for Dad and the IRA guys to hear. Clay walked over and started to close the door, but Dad walked in.

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Protecting my only living son."

Clay went to raise his fist, but Garrett, Keegan, and Joseph busted in. Garrett and Joseph held Clay with his arms behind his back and Keegan got Gemma. Tara was covering CJ's ears from all the noise. He was still crying, but not as upset. They went to walk Gemma and Clay out to the van, but Clay swung his head back and got Garrett right in the nose. I could hear my dad say "Oh shit!" then Garrett shot Clay, point blank three times into his temple. Gemma screamed out, and Joseph whipped around and shot her right in the chest.

"Dammit Dad! This wasn't supposed to happen."

I had never seen my dad so angry. He shoved me up against the wall, holding me there by the collar of my shirt. It honestly scared me. He had never been physical with me like that.

"I didn't plan it to happen like this Jackson! Do not put this on me!"

He released me. Before my very own eyes, Mom and Clay were shot to death. CJ was screaming now from the loud noises so Tara walked him into his nursery. It kind of frightened me that she barely reacted to it.

"Dad, I'm sorry."

"We'll take the bodies back to Belfast. Clean up the blood."

Just like that, he was gone. The IRA carried the bodies out. I got the bleach out and scrubbed the tiles with it, then went back to the nursery. Tara was rocking CJ to sleep, feeding him a bottle.

"Tara... Say something."

"It had to happen. Now we're 16 with a baby to raise. It's all part of the life, right? We can kiss high school goodbye, or any college I would attend. We need to empty out your Mom and Clay's safe and get out of here... SAMCRO will catch on and come after us. We need to go east coast for a while until we're ready for Belfast."

"Are you okay Tara?"

"A little too late to worry about that... We need to get out before it's too late Jax."

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**~Reviews please! Lol what a dramatic chapter... Any suggestions for the next?~**


	4. Chapter 4

**Tara POV**

I worried what Jax would do when I got home. I got the documents signed to be emancipated. I was now considered an independent individual even though I was just almost 17. To get my dad to agree to sign it was a bit more difficult. It was rather painful actually. There was one final beating from him. I knew it would be a bit worse than the others but it was my only way out. I rounded the hill and pulled up the drive to SAMCRO's cabin where we'd be living. He was there, bouncing CJ on his knees. I could see them through the window; they looked so happy. I walked through the door with some groceries I had picked up on the way home for dinner.  
"Hey baby."  
"How'd it go?"  
He stood up and set CJ into his playpen and came over to hug me. I set the bags down and hugged into him, blocking his arms from hugging me tight. I could feeling huge bruises forming all over my stomach and ribs.  
"Everything went fine. It's all done."  
He tried to hug me tighter again, but I pushed his arms away.  
"Tara are you okay?"  
"My back is just a little stiff. Probably slept on it wrong."  
I could just never lie to him. I knew by my difficulty to make eye contact with him, he'd know something worse had happened.  
"How bad did he get you?"  
"Nothing too bad. I'm okay."  
"Let me see."  
"Jax, I'm okay... I promise."  
"If you were okay, you wouldn't hesitate to let me see."  
"Maybe I'm just not confident with my body today."  
"You were fine with it when we had sex this... I need to see how bad he hurt you."  
"Fine..."  
I lifted my shirt up to my bra so he could see my entire stomach and rib cage. I could see anger plaster his face. He looked all over me, and be gently stroked his thumbs over the biggest bruises.  
"Jesus babe... He could have broken your ribs."  
"It only hurt for a second. Now my skin is just a little sensitive. It had to happen for him to sign it."  
"You know, as long as you're with me, nothing like this will ever EVER happen again. You're so beautiful, so strong, so gracious and caring, I don't know why anyone would want to ever hurt you."  
"He's just drunk. If he was sober, he'd be alright."  
"Fuck him. I love you Tara, and I'm going to protect you. I promise you that."  
"I love you too."  
I fixed my shirt again then lifted CJ up to feed him a bottle.  
"He looks a lot like you Jax. And your little brother from what I've seen in pictures."  
"Mom's side of the family has strong genes I guess."  
"Have you called your dad yet?"  
"Plenty of times. He won't talk to me though. Maureen said he's having a hard time with everything he saw."  
"I'm so sorry."  
"Clay shouldn't have fought back."  
"But he did."  
"And he died along with his wife. We have my baby brother now. That's all that matters."  
I'd never be able to make him see a different way about it. Jax would have a hard time answering all the questions CJ would have when he realized what happened to his parents. CJ finished his bottle and sat up in my arms.  
"Ma... Mama?"  
I looked over at Jax and he just smirked. I then looked down at CJ and he was grinning up at me with his chubby and slobbery face.  
"Hi baby..."  
I pulled him up close for a hug.  
"Jax we need to talk about how far we are going to take this."  
"Take what?"  
"Raising CJ... Relationships... Where we are going to be... How far me and you are going to go..."  
"What do you mean how far we'll go?"  
"I heard all about you before we got together... The numerous girls you'd sleep with... It's not going to be good for CJ growing up with so many girls in and out of his life."  
"There aren't going to be so many girls. Tara why do you always think I'm just going to up and leave you... Let me ask you something... From all that you've "heard" about me, have I ever stuck with those girls for more than a night? Did I ever take any of those girls with me to Belfast?"  
"No..."  
"Have I ever fought so hard to be with one girl? To do everything I could to protect them? No... You're something a million times better than them. Obviously for me to stick with you, and be with you so exclusively, you're something special. I would've never let any of those girls around my baby brother either, but here you are raising him with me."  
"I'm sorry."  
"As far as relationships, I want you to be my old lady. CJ thinks of you as his mommy and until he's old enough, it'll stay that way. I'm sure I'll become Dadda."  
"That's pretty cute to think about. I know you put up that big badass biker front for the club, but when you're with me, you're a huge sweetheart and all about the family."  
"Our family."  
"Yes, our family. But where are we going to go? The cabin is nice and so is the privacy but I don't like being in the middle of nowhere either."  
"I want us to get a house when we're old enough... Until then, this will have to do. Oh, I got you a laptop, so you can do your GED work and test on there... I guess I'll get mine too. Opie's setting it up though."  
"That's going to help a lot. But you know, I'll have to get a job. Grocery money will run out soon."  
"I'm going to start working at TM. I'll have enough money for us. I need you to help me watch CJ."  
"That'll work as long as I get a new car... My dad's Cutlass isn't going to be running smoothly much longer."  
"We'll go to a pay with cash kind of place and get you a good reliable car. It needs to be safe enough for CJ to be in too."  
"Of course."

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**~I know it's not as climatic as the previous chapters but oh well... Reviews please. ;) ~**


	5. Chapter 5

**JAX POV **

I woke up in a cold sweat. I had a nightmare of Tig dismembering Tara and CJ while Bobby had me cuffed to a pole to watch, and right as CJ let out his last cry of pain before dying, my dad ran in with Garrett. My fear of getting hurt by SAMCRO was becoming stronger with every passing minute. I turned over and found Tara right beside me in one of my t-shirts and her underwear. She must of gotten up in the middle of the night with the baby or something because we were both naked going to sleep. I turned back over to look at my alarm clock. It read 5:03. After a nightmare like that, there was going to be no way I could go back to sleep. I got up and got dressed, deciding to go for a walk in the woods. I found the stream and knelt down beside it for a while, peering down at the dark reflection of myself. All these doubts about myself I thought would never happen started to. Was I strong enough to protect Tara and CJ? Can I provide for them? I'd be so embarrassed to have to ask my dad for help with things. Then I realized me thinking like this is how my dad was when things were getting bad with my little brother Thomas. I splashed some of the stream water onto my face. I needed to snap myself out of this. Just as I was standing up to walk around a little more, I could hear Tara scream out my name. It echoed through the trees. I got my gun that was strapped to my ankle and went sprinting back to the cabin, gun drawn and everything.

**TARA POV**

I partially woke up and reached out to feel where Jax was to snuggle up to him. He wasn't there. His gun wasn't on the nightstand either. I automatically started panicking. SAMCRO surely came for him. I called his name checking all through the house and I still couldn't find him. I couldn't help but cry as I went onto the back porch and yelled out his name. Shortly after that I could hear the leaves rustling and Jax was running to me.

"Tara, what's wrong?"

I ran over to him and hugged him tight, crying into his chest. He wrapped his arms tightly around me which made me feel so much better.

"Tara, what happened? Why are you upset?"

I pulled away from him and half-heartedly hit him in the chest.

"Dammit Jax, you scared the hell out of me! I thought SAMCRO finally came for you!"

"Everything is gonna be alright Tara... I just didn't want to wake you up."

"Oh so instead you leave me being a nervous wreck? You know... If you're expecting us to live a normal life, it won't happen here."

"How do you expect me to up and leave the only place I've known as home?"

"Well when you have experienced a little over seven and a half years of getting beaten by your dad, it makes you not like the place so much. Belfast is meant for us..."

"We'll talk about this later, alright? As much as I normally enjoy your lack of proper clothing, it's a bit chilly for you to just be standing outside in a t-shirt and underwear."

We walked back inside, and I started to make a pot of coffee. I'd never be able to go back to sleep after that. Jax plopped down on the couch, getting comfortable like he was going to go to sleep.

"Don't think you're off the hook, Teller."

"Babe it's not even six in the morning... Give it a rest."

"Jax we need to come up with an escape plan."

"Dammit Tara. We don't need an escape plan. I know what is best for us and CJ, and fleeing isn't that."

"It needs to be."

Just then there was a loud knock on the door. I went into the bedroom to get some pants on, then of course CJ had to wake up. By the time I got back out to the kitchen to make CJ a bottle, Jax and Opie were getting ready to leave.

"Jackson, you can't leave. We're in the middle of something."

Opie just HAD to butt in.

"So are we... The club thinks they have a lead on Gemma and Clay's disappearance. If Jax isn't there, they're gonna know that we all know something happened."

"It doesn't matter," I looked over at Jax and he was giving me those soft puppy dog eyes., "Jax, if you care about me, you'll stay. You haven't even held your baby brother yet."

He came over and kissed CJ on the cheek, then started to head for the door again.

"I'll be back later babe, I promise."

"Yeah, but I won't be."

"Where are you gonna be?"

"Belfast."

"Tara, no. What the hell is the matter with you?"

"I'm sorry if you don't agree with this but I am sick of having to fear for my life... I'm waiting for a man named Liam to deliver our new birth certificates and passports."

"New?"

"We're aged two years and married. CJ now Cayden James Teller is our kid. Only way it would work in Belfast and leaving the country with a baby that isn't ours. Our plane flies from here to Chicago, to Syracuse, then Britain before we ride on the ferry to Belfast."

"I'm not letting you go anywhere with CJ."

"He calls me Mommy, he's going to need me."

"I'll take care of him perfectly fine."

"Oh bullshit. You'd never make a good father EVER. All you do is suck up to SAMCRO... You're rarely ever home to see us and you don't give a damn about it."

"Family is all I have Tara. I care about you, CJ, and the club. You all are my family."

"No, the club is your family. We're just excuses for you to tell people you have a real family."

"I can't believe you would ever say that. Fine, you want to take my baby brother away, go ahead since we aren't the family I thought we were. I'm done."

"Jax, I'm telling you, if you walk out of that door, we're over."

"I'm gone!"

He stormed out with Opie following him like a lost puppy. If Jax wanted things to be like that, game on. Nothing would stop me from getting out with CJ.

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**~I know it's been a while, my apologies. Please R & R.~**


	6. Chapter 6

**TARA POV**

It took me four hours to pack up our stuff from the cabin into all the suitcases and duffle bags I could find there. I left a certain duffle on the table for whenever Jax came back to the cabin- I knew he would at some point in the day because he is perfect Gemma-John offspring. His temper could flare as bad as Gemma's then he would cool off and apologize in the sweetest ways like John would. In the duffle bag were pictures of us, and pictures of CJ with us, some changes of clothes, and enough cash to get him to Belfast if he didn't go with us that day, along with my promise ring to him.. You would've thought the ring was worth a million dollars by how much it meant to him that I wore it. I wasn't old enough to get the crow, but that would be next. Then I placed his new birth certificate and passport on top. He would need that going through security. After I left the cabin, I went to Gemma's and emptied out all three safes they had. We were the richest teens ever to leave Charming. I made it to the San Diego airport about three hours before my plane was scheduled to depart. After spending $480 dollars for all our luggage to go to Belfast, there was no rush. CJ and I had lunch and walked around up until the time they called for us to board the plane. I was pulling along my carry on that has some books and snacks and drinks to pass the time and of course plenty of diapers and formula and juice for CJ and other little things to keep him distracted. Once I got him up on my hip to walk down the terminal, I heard Jax call out my name. When I looked behind me, he was right there looking so relieved.

"I couldn't find you, I thought you were already gone!"

"Jackson I left you your ticket. We have the same flight. Now come on, we need to go."

"I'm so glad I found you two... Where have you been?"

"Passing time and tiring him out so he will sleep on the plane."

"Oh... right. See, I just had to finish up a few things, now I am ready for Belfast."

"Of course you are."

I was purposely acting that way to him because he should've just stayed in the first place. Who would have given a damn if he was out "searching" for them or not... By the time they realized anything, we'd be at the airport. We got into our seats in the first class area. It would be better than being crowded in the regular section, especially because we had CJ. We got into our seats, with CJ sitting on my lap because of his age. After a while, Jax playing his 20 questions with me for hours on end and nudging me any time I'd start to dose off got really old.

"Jackson, just sit there and be quiet. Quit touching me and quit talking to me. You're worse than CJ."

"What the hell."

"I'm tired, and we hav hour flight. I want to sleep. Leave me alone."

"Jesus, are you on your period or something?"

That was the last straw but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing me lose my cool. I stood up and handed CJ to him.

"You're such a fucking dick. I hope you know that."

I made my way to the airplane bathroom and stood there glaring at myself in the mirror letting my mind race. Then it dawned on me. I hadn't gotten my period since school ended, and before we left for Belfast. That was what... 12 or so weeks ago? I could feel the blood drained from my face. With shaky hands, I lifted my shirt up and noticed my flat stomach wasn't as flat as before. This was the last thing we needed right now. I went back to our seats. Jax reached for my hand to stop me before I sat down but I smacked it away.

"Touch me again and I'll cut your dick off."

After that, I leaned up against the window and slept until we touched down in Britain. We remained silent (with the exception of talking to CJ) until we got picked up by John, Maureen, and Trinity in Belfast. They had already gotten CJ a car seat for the ride, which worked out great. Once we got to their house, Jax and John took all our luggage upstairs while Trinity and CJ watched Elmo on the TV. I went down to the store where Maureen was. I couldn't get the thought of me being pregnant off my mind... Not at 16 ½... This wasn't supposed to happen. I should've graduated high school, and college, and be a surgeon before any kids... I felt sick to my stomach.

"Maureen... Um... Does the store have pregnancy tests?"

She looked at me with a weird look, then it dawned on her.

"Jesus Christ... You think so?"

"I can't even remember the last time I menstruated..."

"Yeah, 3rd aisle, bottom left."

I got one and stood at the register while she rang it up. Just then, Jax walked down and saw it on the counter.

"What the fuck Tara!"

Tears stung the back of my eyes at the harshness of his words.

"Jax... I-"

"I don't want to hear it. Why would you hide this from me?"

Thankfully Maureen said something to him.

"You shouldn't disrespect your child's mother like that."

"You aren't my mother, don't tell me what I can and can't do."

I excused myself and went into the store's bathroom to take the test.

**JAX POV**

I couldn't believe Tara wouldn't tell me... She went to my uptight bitch of a stepmom first. I could go head to head with Maureen all day.

"Maybe that is true Jackson. You had your mother killed. I am your stepmother. You will not disrespect me like this in my store, while you're staying in my house."

"Oh bullshit. You know Dad pays for all of it. It's my dad's house, not yours."

Just then, Dad came down the stairs.

"First of all son, do not cuss at your stepmom, or really at any female. It makes you seem uneducated like you can't find other words to express your emotions. Second of all, I don't ever want to hear you say something like that again. It's Maureen's house just as much as it is mine and if you ever disrespect her like that again, we can go put on some boxing gloves and settle it like grown men."

He then turned to Maureen before continuing on his spiel.

"Go easy on Jax too. His world is changing very fast, faster than any kid his age should have to go through... Cut him some slack."

My dad was right... I walked out to have a smoke but I left the door to the store cracked a little so I could hear when Tara was out. I heard my dad talk in a hushed tone to Maureen.

"The kid just lost his mom. I don't care if he helped orchestrate it, a part of him still died with her. That's still his mom, no matter how horrible she was. Jackson gets his mother's stubbornness. He will never admit it or show it but he will always walk around with the burden of knowing he killed his mom. Even if she deserved it, that won't leave him anytime soon."

I looked back into the window and saw Tara come down from the hall looking a little scared. My dad was right there again.

"Come here sweetheart, it's alright."

She hugged into him and just started to cry.

"No matter what happens with you and Jax, you will always have us to help you out... Whatever you need, you got it."

It was nice to see him comforting her like that, especially because I was probably the last person she would ever want to see right now. It was comforting to know he'd take us in like that. After Tara went upstairs and some time had passed, I went upstairs to Tara laying on the bed with CJ who had just finished a bottle and went to sleep.

"Jax, John and Maureen need to adopt CJ."

"Tara, no, we have this under control."

"I'm not even sure if we're capable of parenting the baby inside of me, I can't damn your brother like that. He deserves a normal life."

"Belfast is a second chance for all of us."

"When I'm all fat and pregnant, I won't be able to do as much with CJ as I can now. We'll have to tell him you're his brother at some point, let it be with him having parents aside from us."

That comment pissed me off.

"How are you about to walk out on my little brother like that?"

**TARA POV **

His anger kept rising, but he needed to understand.

"The same way you'll walk out on me when the baby is born."

"How dare you..."

"I'm sorry but I just know how the life is. You'll have so much baggage with me and a baby. We won't fit in."

I could see him clench his fists. He was beyond pissed.

"Jax, I'm-"

"SHUT UP! All I've been doing is worry about how I'll be able to take care of you! That's all that has been on my mind, and now you say I'm gonna leave?! Wow Tara... Just wow... How about I just leave now?!"

He ran out and slammed the door. I chased after him. He was already half way down the sidewalk by the time I caught up with him.

"Jax, wait!"

I grabbed onto his arm but he shoved me with such force, I fell to the ground. I could feel some glass go into the palm of my hand and my whole wrist was burning. By now, tears were streaming down my face. I was in so much pain.

"STAY AWAY FROM ME, TARA!"

"Jax... Ow, please, my wrist... Jax please."

"No Tara! All I do is picture my future with you and however many children we're gonna have... Now that I know I'm not in your future because you're convinced I'll leave, maybe I need to rethink things."

He took off down the street and I stay on the sidewalk, looking down at my fucked up hand, sobbing from pain and heartbreak. John came out and immediately carried me up into the living room and called Chibs. His V.P that was also the club's doctor. He came and was able to get all the glass out of my hand and stitch up the cuts but would have to come back in the morning to wrap my wrist, after I got the swelling to go down, although he did tell me I had a severe sprain. I all but crawled up to bed with CJ after Maureen got me situated with an ice pack to keep on my wrist while I slept. As soon as my head hit the pillow, I was out like a light.

**JAX POV**

I had jogged to SAMBEL's clubhouse and enjoyed a few beers with some of the guys. They loved when I was around. Once I made my way back home after a few hours, I saw my dad was still awake, despite it being 4 a.m.

"Follow me son."

He had a heating pad in his hand while we went up to my room. Tara was asleep with CJ snuggled up close to her side. There was an ice pack on her right hand- the arm she had draped across CJ to keep him from moving all over. When he took it off, there were all different little clusters of stitches and her hand was all bruised and swollen. I was horrified with what I had done. I took a few steps back while Dad switched out the ice pack with the heating pad. He then turned around and punched me square in the mouth. Blood automatically filled my mouth and my lip stung- it was busted.

"Teller men don't hurt their old ladies in any way, shape, or form. You remember that next time."

He just shook his head at me and walked out. I went into the bathroom to rinse my mouth with some water then I got into some pajamas and headed to the couch for the night.

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**~Longest chapter yet... Please review!~**


	7. Chapter 7

**TARA POV**

A couple months had passed since we moved to Belfast. Raiding Clay and Gemma's safes came in handy because we were able to get our own house a block from John and Maureen's. I was 5 months pregnant now and had a definite baby bump lugged in front of me. Jax had become Sgt. At Arms for SAMBEL. He was set to go on a run with the club to Dublin to establish another chapter. He promised he'd be back in two days but he was leaving the day we were scheduled to figure out the gender of our kid. My wrist now had some ace bandage wrapped around it, instead of the splint I had in the beginning and most of the scars from the stitches had faded. Jax agreed CJ would be better off being raised by John and Maureen as his parents instead of us, but we saw him daily.

"Jax, you can't go on this run. Tell the guys you'll make it up or something."

"Tara, we're making a new charter, I'll be back in just a couple days."

"You're going to miss the ultrasound just like you did last month... This one is most important. Don't you want to know if you're going to have a son or daughter?"

"Of course I do but I need to be there for the club. You can call me right after, I promise I'll answer."

"Please Jax... It starts off like this, then soon you'll be entirely gone."

"Quit talking such negativity into our relationship. I'll make it up to you, but I need to go."

"Fine. Go away."

My pregnancy hormones would make me so short with him, more than usual.

"I'll miss you every second I'm gone..."

"Then don't go."

"Babe..."

He leaned in for a kiss but I turned away, carrying a basket of our clean laundry to put in our room.

"Keep your dick in your pants while you're on the road. Impress me for once."

I knew that comment would stick with him the whole time he was away. If Jax would've just stayed home, he'd be able to be surprised when I brought Opie home from the airport, but I guess I'd have 2 days with Opie to just hang out. He had called me when he landed and we only lived 15 minutes from the airport, so I got him on the way to the ultrasound. The doctor in there said Opie must be a proud father and we both cracked up and had to explain he was "my brother" and that he was a proud uncle to what would be a nephew for him. Jax and I were going to have a little boy. Then of course the car ride home was quiet. I was so mad at Jax for not being there. When we got there, I showed him where our spare bedroom was which was where he would be staying for the remainder of his stay. I made us a quick batch of spaghetti for dinner, again remaining quiet. After we finished and sat on the couch together watching some TV, he finally asked me what was wrong.

"Jax is never around... I sit in this house alone and pregnant and he doesn't give a shit. He's so passive with all things having to deal with the baby and I feel like he doesn't care... That and he hasn't had sex with me since before we got here... It's because I'm fat and hormonal. I know he's cheating on me! I can't even begin to think of anyone who would let me cheat on him with! Babies are a lot of baggage, especially while pregnant!"

I was totally bawling, unable to control my pregnancy hormones. He wrapped his arms around me and consoled me like Jax should be... I cried into his shoulder until I ran out of tears, then I lifted my head up and Opie and I made eye contact. Before I knew it, we were kissing and something clicked, or maybe it was the sharp kick my son gave me.

"No Ope... Oh god no Ope... You're Jax's best friend... You're like a brother to me... No..."

I couldn't believe what we had just done.

"Tara... I'm sorry... I took advantage of you being vulnerable."

I started sobbing again and ran into the bedroom, slamming the door and locking in behind me, longing for Jax's return.

* * *

**~Welp... You can thank Denise for that part. She ignited a spark in me by making a certain comment and will be held responsible for the mayhem of the next few chapters. ;) ~**


	8. Chapter 8

**TARA POV**

I woke up to Jax banging on the bedroom door. I wasn't expecting him for another day or so, and I hadn't called him yesterday to tell him we were going to have a little boy. I got up and unlocked the door.

"Tara, are you alright?! Why was the door locked?"

"I uh, I just wanted to lock it since you weren't home. I thought you were going to be gone for a few more days?"

"And miss your 17th birthday? Never babe... We got a lot done yesterday so I came back. What do you want to do today?"

"Opie is here... In the spare... I was trying to surprise you but you had left for Dublin before his plane touched down."

"Well we can include him too."

"Honey, I need to talk to you. You need to promise you won't flip out on Opie... Or me."

"Dammit Tara, what did you do?"

"We left the OBGYN yesterday after finding out the gender because I got him on my way to the ultrasound... And you know how moody I've been lately with the pregnancy hormones and everything. I was so angry at you... You should've been the one with me for that... If Opie wasn't there, I would've been alone like I always am... And I melted down after dinner and he consoled me... I don't know what happened after that but he kissed me. I kissed back for a split second, out of habit of being kissed but then it clicked... I was horrified."

"I'm going to fucking kill him."

"Jax, no! Listen... He apologized... It was a heat of the moment kind of thing."

"I can't believe you would cheat on me..."

"I didn't cheat! Jax tell me how many times you've kissed girls in front of me, while we were together! I told you we were both horrified. I stayed in here the rest of the night, that's why the door was locked."

"I leave you for one night... One night Tara."

"I'm sorry Jax, alright? Please just stop... You're always gone, it's never just one night. You haven't been to any of the ultrasounds except the initial one to see I was actually pregnant. I wait around all day, cooking and cleaning, so you can come home happy, yet some nights you never even come home. I'm stored away in this house all day, pregnant with YOUR child, and you can't even respect me enough to come home at night."

"I got things to do."

"Is that going to be your excuse when the baby comes? I wasn't crazy for saying you'll walk out on us... You are gradually doing it already. If you're miserable being with me... if you don't love me... Then don't pain me by sticking around for nothing. It's not just about me anymore. It's our son. We're having a little boy and I won't let him grow up with some crazy chaotic life like yours. I will do everything in my power to keep him from becoming what you have. Even in the short year or so that we have been together, you're changing so much."

"Things will change when he comes then. We'll be fine."

"Things this, things that. Things to do, things will change... I have a hard time believing that."

"That's not my problem."

"You're right, it's mine... Our relationship... Our baby... Our move here, it's all on me. I get that. I won't beg for your forgiveness, and I won't wait for you to be a good boyfriend and father. It's either now or never."

"I came back to have a good time with you, now you're lecturing me like you're my mom."

"That's not possible, remember? Your mom was offed right in front of us and CJ. I can't be your mom... Maureen can't either. You have serious mommy issues."

"I'm just fine without her."

"And if you don't change how you are, our son will be saying the same with you. He deserves the best... He deserves to grow up in a happy home with both of his parents around. Or you will see your son growing up with a stepfather just like you did..."

"You know what? Then let him have a stepfather since you think I can't do anything for you and him! I'm done with you trying to control me Tara. I'm young, let me live my life."

"And I'm not? You still live yours like nothing has happened! You still have your fucking club and all the shit that comes with it! What do I have? NOTHING. Absolutely fucking nothing. I don't have you anymore, I don't have my few friends back in Charming, I don't have a chance with anything anymore! At least my life is changing for my son... I don't have a choice to be around him, he's inside me. So if you want to live your life, who am I to hold you back, right?"

"Exactly! I need to have fun while I still can..."

"Yeah, just go knock up other girls and leave them alone with it all. You're no man at all Jackson Teller."

"How dare you."

"It's the truth."

"I'm done. I'm going to stay at my Dad's... Don't think of apologizing to me either. I don't want to hear it."

"Why would I apologize when I meant it all..."

Just like that, he was gone... Happy 17th to me... Just then, my phone rang and it was my dad.

"Hi Dad..."

"Tara Grace, I'm so glad I got a hold of you... I know you're in Seattle with that boyfriend of yours, but I need you to come home... To Charming... I'm in St. Thomas... My liver, kidneys, and lungs are failing after all the years of drinking and popping pills. Doctors say my days are numbered to literally days... Not even a week left. I know I was a shitty dad to you after your mom passing, so if you don't come, I understand... I love you Tara Grace, and soon I will be with your mother... I just want to see my daughter one last time..."

I was shocked... I couldn't even cry yet.. I wouldn't let myself cry.

"I'll be on the first flight there, I promise... You hold on Daddy, I'll be there by dinner... Please don't leave me yet..."

"I'll do my best. You're the best thing that ever happened to me Tara Grace... Don't ever forget it. I love you honey."

"Oh daddy, I love you too."

"And happy birthday... I got you something but I don't have an address to send it to. It's back at the house..."

"I'll be there soon... We'll have a cake, alright?"

"See you soon sweetie."

I couldn't believe it... The man I once hated was dying, and God, he was so different sober. I wouldn't miss out on this... There was nothing Jax could do either. I'd be there for my father's passing, I'd be there for the funeral, I'd be there for it all.

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**~Reviews please.~**


	9. Chapter 9

**TARA POV**

I called Liam and Garrett and told them to have the jet ready to leave in an hour. I needed to get to Charming without having to switched flights all the time like when I flew to Belfast. I went to Maureen's store. I had to get more prenatal vitamins and I wanted some drinks and snacks for the flight. John was down in the store too with Trinity. They looked so happy to see me.

"How are you feeling, honey? You pick out whatever you want, Grandpa will pay. Jax told me you guys are having a boy. I can't wait to have a grandson."

John winked at me and I just smiled.

"Where is he now? Clubhouse?"

"Upstairs making CJ some lunch."

"I have to go back to Charming for a little bit... My fathers dying. He can go any time... Jax is against me going but I can't just let my dad die alone. Jax is struggling with how to feel about Gemma's death and I wouldn't be able to handle myself if I was in his position."

"Well, we can fly out tomorrow. It's your birthday... We can do anything, you should enjoy your day. It's not everyday that you turn 17."

"And it's not everyday that your father is on his death bed. Liam and Garrett are going to fly me out on the jet so I can get there as soon as possible. I'm supposed to meet them in about thirty minutes."

"Jax is going with you, right?"

"He doesn't know yet... I want him to come, but he despises my dad so I doubt he will."

"I'll go talk to him."

"No, it needs to come from me."

"Well alright... I'll get you some things to have on the plane, you got to hurry and get him."

"Yes sir."

I waddled my way up the steep stairs, out of breath as I reached the top, the little boy inside me not pleased with the exercise. Jax was feeding CJ some macaroni and cheese. CJ saw me and grinned at me. He had Clay's ginormous grin- too big for his face.

"Hi sissy!"

"Hi bubby, keep eating okay?"

"Of tourse."

Jax smiled at CJ's illiterate words, then looked at my and the smile was wiped away.

"Jax, I have to go to Charming..."

"What now?"

"It's my dad... He's dying."

"Good riddance."

"Jax, I'm being serious. The doctors say he doesn't have much time left..."

"Tara, you aren't going. There is no point. Just stay here."

"Dammit Jax, he could die any day... Any hour... Any minute!"

"So what? Why show him the compassion he never showed you?"

God, Jax made my blood boil sometimes.

"Because no matter what, he is my father through it all. I know that doesn't mean shit to you had your own mother killed."

He shot up out of his chair and raised his fist like he was going to hit me. I gave him a taunting look to challenge him. I know he'd never do it. He took a deep breath and dropped his fist.

"Low blow Tara, low blow. That was done to protect my family... to save my little brother and get out of the club, which was done for you by the way."

"Yeah because that really worked, with what, going on runs, still raising your hand to me like most bikers do their old ladies?"

"There is a big difference between the club over here and SAMCRO. Plus, I didn;t hit you, I never would."

"Yeah but that doesn't change the fact that you get the same look in your eyes that my Dad always got."

"See? This is exactly what I mean... All the fear he puts you in, why give him the satisfaction of seeing you before he dies?"

"He's still my father. I hope our son turns out as rude and disrespectful as you so you understand what we all go with dealing with you... I love you Jax, I really do... I always try and see the best in you even when it's nearly impossible to find, but you're setting yourself up to be a terrible example for our kid."

"I'm not going to be an abusive prick of a father and I'll actually be around."

"I don't have time to go back and forth with you all day and quite frankly you are making my birthday shittier than it already is. You either come with me or you don't... If I go by myself, it'll take me longer to tie up all the loose ends and it won't be safe for me to fly in another month or two and I really can't fly until the baby is old enough, but then again, maybe that's what's best for us since you so desperately want to just live your life, no strings attached."

"Would you stop with that?"

"You were the one that said it, not me... I have to go. Garrett and Liam are flying me to Charming."

"Well then I'll come with you."

I knew he would have kept trying to go back and forth with me but he thinks Garrett is determined to hook up with me so as soon as he heard his name involved he was set to come

"Now you want to come?"

"I'm not going to let you get beat by him again and I won't let you be alone when you have our kid."

"Well come on then... We need to leave now."

"I'll take the car back to our house and grab some stuff for me, we can use one of Dad's coolers for food and drinks, get that ready while I'm gone."

He got back from packing just as I got done loading up the cooler, and we headed off for Charming.

"Tara, have you thought up any names for him?"

"I'm not sure... I want his middle name to be Thomas though... Honoring your little brother."

"Well I like the name Abel for his first name..."

"Abel Thomas?"

"Abel Thomas Teller. That's a perfect name."

"I think so too."

"Tara..."

I knew he was going to start to apologize... I didn't care, I hated apologies. He wouldn't have said or done anything if he didn't mean it.

"It's fine Jax... You're here now, that's what matters."

"I shouldn't have said what I did."

"Please just don't... Everything is okay."

"I shouldn't have raised my fist to you... I shouldn't have said any of that... I just got mad. I didn't mean it, I promise."

"Okay."

"I love you Tara... You and Abel are my whole world, I want what's best for both of you that's why I try so hard to protect you."

"Because spraining and cutting up my hand while I'm pregnant with your son is protecting me so well."

"Clearly I need to work on my anger management."

"Preferably before the baby comes. I don't want him to have to go through anything that I did with my dad."

"Tara, I'd never hurt him..."

"Just me, that's even better."

"Tara, please... I love you... I'll make it all up to you."

"Sure you will... I love you too..."

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**~Reviews please.~**


	10. Chapter 10

**JAX POV**

About half way through our flight back to Charming, Tara had fallen asleep. She'd need all she could get for the upcoming events set to transpire over the next few days. I felt so bad for all I had done to her. I all but ruined her birthday by flipping out on her. All the shit I said too, I didn't mean that. It was just so hard having to adjust to Belfast and everyone there, having Tara pregnant, and trying to play it off with SAMCRO that I went to Belfast because my father needed me. It was just so much stuff to handle. I lifted up the arm rest that separated me and Tara and carefully pulled her close to me. I just needed someone and she was right there. She woke up for a second from the movement but then snuggled right into me and fell back asleep. That was so much better. It felt good to feel her again. I would have to wait to tell her I was going to be Vice President of SAMBEL since Chibs was more comfortable being Sgt. At Arms and he wanted the "Prince" to be beneath the King of the Sons of Anarchy. I shortly fell asleep after that with my arms snug around Tara and Abel.

**TARA POV**

I woke up from the movement of us touching down. Back to the place I thought I'd never want to see, but now it was the only place I wanted to be. I sat up which woke Jax up too.

"We're here Jax."

"Mmm, back in Charming... Liam and Garrett are going to help us get things situated with your house when we need it but until then they'll be in Anaheim taking care of their own business."

"Oh... Okay..."

When would I tell him I wanted to come back to Charming? The small town life wouldn't be so bad with all the people we hated gone: Gemma, Clay, and soon to be my dad. I'd be able to go to college here and have Abel grow up in the same places I did. I was a smart student, top of my class always... I needed to make something out of my life instead of just being an old lady. I wanted to be a surgeon ever since I had to change out the bandages when my mom had her surgeries to get the cancerous tumors out of her when I was 8. I could never be a surgeon in Belfast... I could never make a life out of anything in Belfast. Jax, John, and I all stuck out like sore thumbs to the Irish people since we were American. I was just so sick of feeling uncomfortable. We got off the jet and was greeted by Piney and Bobby in SAMCRO's black van. It was nice to be back on American soil after months of being in Belfast. None of them knew I was pregnant so they were all surprised.

"Ahhh, let ole Princey knock you up?"

I laughed at Piney because it was a pet peeve of Jax's to be called Prince or any other forms of it.

"I'm almost 6 months pregnant. It's a little boy we decided just earlier to name Abel."

"That's a nice name... Good name choice, think Jax's is ready?"

"He doesn't really have a choice... I think he's scared though."

Jax glared at us.

"I'm not scared, just nervous."

Honestly, what did he have to be nervous about? He was ALWAYS at the clubhouse or going on runs with the club... He's always been like that... He doesn't have to worry about being uncomfortable and hungry all the time, or the contractions and pushing when I was in labor, or even the breastfeeding and sleepless nights when Abel was born. Even more of a reason for me to stay in Charming- at least I'd feel a little more at home. I found great comfort in Piney's company too. He was more of a father to me than my dad was. He always took great care of me.

"Tara, we have your jeep at the house... Bobby and I have been straightening up your dad's house so you two can stay there tonight."

"Oh, Piney you didn't have to do that. I would have."

"Not pregnant you won't... He had it a total shit hole."

"Yeah, I had a feeling..."

We made it to their house and transferred our bags from the van to my jeep and headed for St. Thomas to see him. He was in room 461 in the ICU. We made it into the room and saw a nurse updating his charts. She seemed like she knew what she was doing well enough.

"You must be his daughter..."

"Tara Teller... This is my husband Jax."

"Ahh, Clay Morrow's boy, right? That motorcycle gang..."

I guess she knows what she's doing, but not saying. I saw Jax's attitude change right then and there.

"For one, I'm John Teller's son and two, it's a club, we aren't a gang."

"Right, my apologies. Anyways, we've been keeping him alive the best that we can but we don't have enough resources to keep him going much longer... The failure is happening more rapid than we can slow it... I'd say another day or two and then he's gone."

I know I should've been crying, but I just couldn't. I loved my father, no doubt about it but I was just so detached from him now, there was no point in letting my whole world be crushed with him dying. I'd keep myself together like good old ladies should.

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**~Reviews please. I will write again later tonight.~**


	11. Chapter 11

**TARA POV**

We had a small birthday cake in the hospital room with my dad then he told me where to find my birthday present in the house. It was in his nightstand along with many empty prescription bottles and empty liquor bottles. He gave me my mom's necklace that had been passed down 4 generations including mine. It was simple but still beautiful... A gold circle with diamonds lining it and a square cut emerald in the middle. Jax placed it around my neck and then we finally had sex since Abel's conception although it was with the lights off with only a candle in the bathroom burning because I didn't want him to see how my body had changed because I wasn't comfortable with how I looked anymore. I felt so awkward as a teen in a woman's body. Jax on the other hand seemed to love it because all his favorite things got bigger. Anyways, around 5 a.m, I got a call from St. Thomas that my dad was fading quickly and that we had an hour, if that. Jax and I got up and dressed quickly and I rushed out the door while Jax was clearly stalling. He was still miffed that I wanted to be there. I didn't want my dad to die alone, and even being pregnant I wouldn't cry or mourn his loss. Genetics were the only things keeping us related... After all he put me through with the abuse and neglect when my mom died up until moving to the cabin with Jax, I often wished he wasn't my dad. Although I knew it would be totally different if I never met Jax or been around the club because I'm sure no matter the abuse I'd still love my dad but now he was just an abuser and so I rather him dead than alive. When we got to the hospital, he was in and out of consciousness so I told the nurses to just pull the plugs. He wasn't even able to acknowledge us. Just like that, I signed the death certificate with Jax and walked out.

"Tara, you're kind of scaring me... No tears or anything?"

"I've had too many bloody lips, black eyes, and broken ribs from him for tears."

"Well now we get to head back to Belfast."

"Maybe, maybe not."

"What are you talking about?"

He started driving us back to my dad's house.

"I'm not comfortable in Belfast, Jax... I want to stay here."

"Belfast is our home... That's where our family is... CJ, Trinity, Dad, and Maureen."

"No Jackson, that's your family. I have a cousin in San Diego but that's it now that my dad just died... And now I have Abel."

"And me."

"Most of the time..."

"No Tara, all of the time."

"No, you have your club all the time... Whether it's SAMCRO or SAMBEL, the club comes first."

"That's not true."

"You're full of shit... Don't get me started. I'm staying here in Charming, and that's final."

"Well what am I supposed to do?"

"It's me and your son or your dad and club."

"Don't make me choose, please."

"Because it will be them, right? Without a doubt it's always going to be them."

"I NEVER SAID THAT!"

I glared at him for barking at me and he took a deep breath.

"Jackson, how am I supposed to raise our son if I'm not comfortable? We stick out so much in Belfast and I have no friends or anything here..."

"Fine then... We'll move back but I have some things to do in Belfast before I get back here... You can stay with Piney... It'll take me 2 or 3 weeks tops... I'll pack everything up too and be back with my little brother."

"I'm gonna have Piney and Bobby gut the house bare... Totally empty of everything... I'll pick out all the things for our house to be like new... There will be no signs of my dad ever being there."

"I trust you with that... I promise I do... I'll stick around for another week to help you tie up loose ends and then I'll head back with Garrett and Liam then I'll be back in less than a month."

"Okay..."

"I love you Tara."

"Me too."

Something just felt off about the situation, but I couldn't put my finger on what it was...

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